God’s promise

Later I’ll share more about my “sabbatical” and how that came to be. But I did want to jump into where I am now and how it came to be. But in order for me to do that I need to back track and share how God began to bring healing and guidance during the time I took off. It was shortly after arriving in Israel, as I was praying one morning the Lord led me to read Psalms 107. When I got to the following verses, it was as if it were describing me.

⁴ Some wandered in desert wastelands,
    finding no way to a city where they could settle.
⁵ They were hungry and thirsty,
    and their lives ebbed away.
⁶ Then they cried out to the Lord in their trouble,

I felt like I had been wandering in the desert for a long long time. Sure I had had times of refreshment but overall I felt that my life thus far had been a desert and I had nothing to show for it. At this point I was going through the hardest drought and felt my life fleeting away into nothingness. Now here I was, crying out to my Savior. As I continued reading the psalm my promise followed.

and he delivered them from their distress.
⁷ He led them by a straight way
    to a city where they could settle.
⁸ Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love
    and his wonderful deeds for mankind,
⁹ for he satisfies the thirsty
    and fills the hungry with good things.

Not only did it give me a promise it also reminded me of the character of my God. He is faithful, loving, satisfying and giver of good things. Here I was disillusioned because I felt that everything I had ever wanted had been denied to me. Yet the truth is that God satisfies and he does fill the hungry with good things. Through these verses God showed me how to pray for myself and also for my family. See, God not only saw my need and heard my cry, He also knew my heart for my family therefore, He showed me how to pray for them and taught me to know how to release them to Him.

Fast forward a few months, as I returned to my home in Chihuahua I was still without a clue as to where God would lead me. Yet I had the sense that my stay in Chihuahua would be temporary. About six months later, I got a call about considering coming to work at Rancho 3M. I had known about this orphanage/shelter since some of the staff and volunteers would go to what used to be my home church in El Paso. So the praying began to see if this is where God was leading me to.

A couple of weeks after that call, I had a phone interview with the director and manager of Rancho 3M and we agreed to pray for a couple of weeks to seek God’s direction. On the next call, all parties felt at peace to continue the process so it was decided I would visit the ranch to meet some of the staff and kids. A couple of weeks later, I drove in to Juarez and met them at a church where some of the kids were participating in an orchestra concert. Afterwards I was to follow them to the ranch. (I was quite excited about that, since I love music). I arrived just barely as the concert had just began so I sat somewhere in the back. Turned out I was sitting right behind them…God’s sovereignty at work. 🙂

I hesitated sharing what I’m about to share but it is significant so here it is. After the first group of kids played another group took the stage. As they began to play/sing, all of a sudden, I felt what I imagine most parents feel when they see their kids performing. It was an overwhelming feeling of being proud like if your heart is about to explode with emotion and then suddenly saw myself like that mom that is all over the front taking a zillion pictures of her kid. And here I was feeling that way and I didn’t even know the kids! So what was the big deal for me? I’m not an emotional person. I’m more of a thinker/practical person, it usually turns out my emotions trail way behind. So for me to have that overwhelming emotion was very abnormal. Wanting to be careful not to make decision on emotion, I kept that on check and continued to pray for God to lead me by a straight way to where I was to settle.

The couple of days I spent at the Ranch went well. I was moved by their vision and was a bit surprised at the good response from some of the kids. In any case, it was after about a month afterwards that I was officially offered the position, which I accepted without hesitation. During all my times of prayer and contemplating what this decision would bring, I continually had a constant peace. This was going to be a permanent move, and even taking that into consideration, there was no fear nor anxiety to make a long term maybe even a life long commitment. My contract with the company I was working for was to end on June and so I was to drive to the Ranch on July 3rd. Even the timing of all of this was to the dot! Only God can orchestrate to such detail. So when the day arrived I squeezed everything I could into a car God generously provided for me through a dear family, and drove off to start a new chapter in my life. (See He is a giver of good things!)